Life After - My take on what happens with Raidan after Twisted
by Marilyn23
Summary: Exploration of what happens to Raidan aka Kavan after Twisted


It was her favorite time of year, Christmas in London was what dreams were made of. She sat in the airport waiting to board her flight. It was going to be a long journey but the distraction was welcomed. So much had happened since her introduction into the world of acting and she needed a break. She had started to make a name for herself as she was casted to do the biopic for R&B sensation Aaliyah. She was chosen shortly before her TV Show Twisted was slated to end. She had gained so many fans over such a short period the experience was at times surreal to her. "All passengers on flight 208 we are now boarding at Gate 3" the woman's voice came over the intercom interrupting her thoughts. Getting her coat and bag she headed for Gate 3. In first class, the hostess asked her if she was ok and she graciously said "yes I am thank you" and continued listening to her music. Many persons thought they knew what life was like in Hollywood, sure you made money, wore fancy clothes and got the opportunity to travel but it was perhaps the loneliest place on earth. She was before dating her co-star Carl. It was such an unexpected romance, she did think he was cute but initially her affinity was to her other costar Aiden who played her love interest. Aiden was dating at the time and the timing was really off for them to even consider starting a romance though they both had this strong connection. Though she pushed the idea far from her mind and didn't actually believe in the concept of soul mates she was floored by how much alike they were and their attraction to each other. She did respect him for his faithfulness because while the temptation was there he never once crossed the lines with her and behaved in a way that would cause her to question his fidelity, which was something that caused her affinity toward him to grow stronger.

Carl was a strong, sweet and funny guy. He was initially very outgoing but after they started dating he became somewhat withdrawn, she didn't mind though because all of his attention was geared toward her. People wouldn't understand that she had insecurities because people always told her how beautiful she was. She did feel beautiful but still always had body image issues though it was nothing to the extent where she had any disorders just the regular feelings of insecurity many women would experience at that time in their lives. She smiled thinking back at how Carl used to make her laugh, she hadn't expected a romance to blossom that soon because she really was only intent on being focused on work but loneliness got the best of her and he was good to her so it happened. The feelings of sadness started rushing over her once more causing her breath to hitch in her throat. Four years into their relationship, she had sacrificed so much for him and he decided that he wasn't happy anymore and needed a new start. She suspect that maybe he might have had an affair but had no evidence of it. She had to think it was someone else because if it was no one else it would mean that it was her. She thought back to her parents and the feelings of hurt and guilt that plagued her as they were haunting her once more. Her parents were having challenges in their marriage but decided to stay together and work for the sake of the children. The arguments were epic and as the eldest child she always blamed herself. From an early age she became very independent and was motherly towards her younger brothers. Several years down the line she found out her father had another child outside of his marriage. That was the end of the relationship between her parents as they decided to finally call it quits. She had vowed to herself based on what happened to her parents that she would only marry for love. She initially didn't love Carl but told herself that she would grow to love him and she did. Carl had wanted them to get married shortly after Twisted ended but she was about to start a new project and wanted to commit herself to that. Of course, he was not as understanding as she anticipated. Carl had expressed his concern about her and Aidan's closeness. They had done some interviews and he was upset with her after saying that they were both flirting with each other and that Aurora just sat there and acted a fool because she (Aurora) was always more a fan of Aidan. She was pissed but acknowledged what he was saying about the flirting, though she explained it was harmless and that it was just something for the fans. After that argument she decided to slowly avoid any major discussions with Aidan especially considering that during the time they did the interviews he was single. She tried not to think about just how awful their timing was because when she got with Carl his relationship ended. She still couldn't believe it, she stayed with Carl; essentially chose him above all others and he was the one to break up with her. She was initially heartbroken to the point where she couldn't leave her apartment for days, she lost some amount of weight which wasn't good at all (talk about body image issues) and to top it all off she didn't really have anyone to talk to. Aidan was always busy and things with Jamie had gotten pretty serious as with Aurora and her beau. She let out a long cleansing sigh and closed her eyes. "The past is in the past" she said out loud to herself and then relaxed in her seat and she decided to use the time to catch up on some well needed sleep.

….

"Hey", she spun around at the sound of a voice she was all too familiar with.

"Hey" she said meeting his gaze, she looked briefly into his big brown eyes and diverted her gaze to something, anything that could have taken her focus from him.

"I didn't know you would come, I – I mean I was hoping that you would come but I didn't know that you would". He placed his hands in his pockets.

Silence slowly crept in "so" she said hesitantly meet his gaze.

"How was your flight?"

"It was good, thanks for asking" she smiled

"How is the bride to be?" she asked forcing a smile.

"She's great, we are happy that you decided to come" he said looking directly at her. She felt her chest tighten because of all the places in the world she was in London to attend his wedding. She never understood why at that moment a wave of sadness came over her and she felt she no longer had the courage to look at him.

"Are you ok?" he asked touching her shoulder "I am here if you want to talk…ammm…I'm really sorry about you and Carl I heard what happened"

"It's nothing" she lied "water under the bridge". "Thanks for inviting me" she continued.

"So I will see you later then" he said with his charming half-smile

"Yea, later" she said as he turned and walked toward his other guests.

She watched as he walked away from her and felt all her senses go. She felt weak and sick. She was in love with him, she had always been in love with him but she told herself she couldn't be and lied and lied and lied and now it was all catching up to her. She missed him, he was always trying to reach out to her, he did so on social media because when Carl was around if he called she had to dismiss him and act as if he didn't really matter.

"Aidan" she called out

He stopped abruptly his back still turned to her.

"I need to tell you something"

By now everyone at engagement party was looking at her

"I think…" she paused and he slowly turned around

"What?" he asked. She was unable to read the expression on his face.

Realizing that all eyes were now on her including Jamie's she said "congratulations, I am so happy for you".

He nodded his head in acknowledgement while everyone lifted their glasses and said cheers.

Silently she cursed herself for being a wimp for not saying what she came there to say.

"I love you Aidan" she whispered as tears filled her eyes and she smiled at all the unsuspecting guests.

The ground below her started to shake and fear shot through her body as she realized her world was coming to an end. The tears flowed freely as she turned and ran as far away from the house as she could go.

"Miss…miss" she heard him say but when she looked around saw no one. The gentleman sitting beside her shook her gently.

Her heart was racing, she was perspiring like crazy and felt herself shaking and realized that she must have been dreaming. Her chest heaved as she came in to the reality of her surroundings.

"You must have had a pretty awful dream" he said "You're crying" he offered her his handkerchief.

"I'm sorry" she said "yea it was a nightmare" she responded as she took the handkerchief proceeded to wipe her face.

"Would you like to talk about it" the kind elderly man asked

"I would rather not, but thanks for offering your ear and thanks for the use this" she said returning the handkerchief.

He smiled at her and said "you can keep it". After a few more moments passed in silence he said "being in love can be a frightening thing, you shouldn't have to whisper your love for someone. You need to shout it out with all your might" he smiled "I hope it works out little lady" he patted her hand and continued to read his paper.

Rain breathed a sigh of relief at the reality that she had been dreaming but was equally embarrassed because she had been talking in her sleep. It had been a while since she had spoken to Aidan. After Twisted everyone vowed they would stay in contact but in her pursuit to keep Carl happy she avoided Aidan speaking to him only when he made the effort to contact her. Soon, he was working on other projects and touring the world. She stilled followed him on social media and would read various articles about him from time to time but the efforts on his part became lesser and lesser. She convinced herself it was for the best as this would make her life with Carl much easier. The last she had heard about his love life was that he was supposedly engaged but then she suspected that something went awfully wrong because Jamie whom she also followed removed all his pictures from her IG and was seemingly dating someone new. They were always taking breaks, she couldn't keep up. She didn't have the courage to just reach out to him after so many years just to get a peek into his personal life. Timing was really awful, now when they were possibly both single (she silently prayed that maybe he was) they were out of touch and had been for such a long time it wouldn't matter now.

She fought with herself for choosing to go to London, she could have gone anywhere else in the world but she chose there because she knew that is where he would be along with his family. She had hoped that she would accidentally on purpose run into him because she was struggling with the truth about what she felt for him and she needed to rid herself of the load she felt she was carrying around in order to move on. She was dating but life post Carl was far more difficult than she had anticipated, no one caught her attention and dating was not as fun as she had anticipated it would be. She was so out of touch, sure she had her girlfriends to talk to but now they were all settled down and either in serious relationships or married so some of her girl time seriously got cut down. She was too ashamed to reach out to Aurora and was thankful when Aurora reach out to her shortly after the break up. Thanks to her former co-star and friend she was able to work through most of her anger and hurt, she was also able to openly admit that she did have some feelings for Aidan that she locked away. She even opened up to Aurora about an incident that happened between her and Aidan. She was with Carl and he was single. Carl was away with his golfing buddies for the weekend and in her boredom she called Aidan and suggested that they hung out. He was happy to oblige and they went out to eat sushi (they had never done that alone) then they went back to his place where they chatted about his travels.

"Today was great, I really had fun" he said "too bad we can't hang like that more often"

"Yeah, it wasn't that bad huh?" she turned to him and smiled.

They were sitting on his couch.

"I love what you've done with the place" she said looking around his eccentric but inviting living space.

"Thanks I try to collect something from all my travels back with me as a reminder that I did go there" he laughed "I need to have evidence of my great journeys when I am telling the stories to my grand kids".

"Oh yea…we all know you live to tell stories…I bet they will love you and your crazy though"

"It sounds like you love me and my crazy" he said half-joking half serious

"Kick rocks Aidan, not everyone is a groupie you know"

"Well I am not afraid to say I am your #1 groupie Rain" he joked reaching for her elbow.

"You need to stop" she threatened smiling "you know I hate it when people touch my elbows and my knees"

"I know but I can't help it" he teased

At this point they were not sitting very far from each other as the teasing and joking continued.

She was squealing and giggling with all the touching and laughing they were doing. He found himself laughing so hard it felt great because he hadn't laughed like that in a long time. Jamie was always nagging him about Rain and he tried explaining to her that they were just friends. Sure he found Rain attractive and he told Jamie this but he was committed. Yet almost every day he had to justify his relationship and conversations with Rain and it was tiring. In the heat of an argument they were having Jamie told him that he was a liar because she knew he had feelings for Rain and he vehemently denied this saying that they do get along really well and that she is great BUT he doesn't harbour those feelings towards her. He argued that they don't even hang out which Jamie knew to be true but still wasn't convinced.

In that moment the reality did hit him that what Jamie was saying could be true, he had put himself fully in the role he played alongside Rain as her on-screen boyfriend because deep down he wanted that but couldn't get it in reality. Their situations were way too complicated. Yet when acting he felt chills when they would kiss and the way she looked at him he secretly hoped that was Rain and not the character she was playing.

"Snap out of it" she said "and quit staring at me"

"Well obviously you were staring right back at me to know I was staring at you" he hit back.

"This was fun, we need to do this again" she said still holding his gaze

"We should" he responded inching closer to her

"Aidan, what are you doing" she asked realizing that the space between their faces was closing in.

"I don't know" he answered under his breath; she could feel his breath tickle her skin

"Do you want me to stop?" he asked continuing his feat. She was unable to speak because his nose touched hers and she could smell the sweetness of his breath as it caressed her nose. She leaned in and before they both knew what was happening their lips touched. It was slow at first, she was used to this, it was just like their characters would do but then his hand started stroking her face as his tongue sought refuge in her mouth. She obliged and was so caught up in the moment that she flung her hands around his neck and started to really delve into the kiss.

"We shouldn't be doing this" he moaned in between the kisses

Shocked and upset with herself she pulled away from him.

"Oh God, what have I done?" she said putting her hands in her face embarrassed by the reality of what just took place.

"I'm sorry" he pleaded "shit…it's my fault" he said trying to calm her down as now she had started to hyperventilate.

"It was a mistake" she said

He felt like someone had slapped him across the face, he knew it was wrong because she was dating someone and he didn't mean to put her in this position but to say it was a mistake after the way they kissed was causing him to feel his heart-break. Never in all his relationship with Jamie had he ever felt the things he felt when he was with Rain. He knew she felt it too but understood why she held back.

"Sure" was all he could mutter while running his hands through his hair.

"Just think of it like we were running lines in preparation for a scene. Don't worry about it, it won't happen again" he said not fully believing it himself while he reached out and wiped away her tears.

He could feel himself being drawn in once more, his hand on her face, her eyes searching his for answers that he himself was seeking. Soon her eyes drifted to his lips and then he did the unthinkable. He used his thumb to trace over her lips. She shuddered in anticipation of what she wasn't sure but was in a heighten state as her senses had become razor-sharp after that kiss. Their foreheads touched and their noses rubbed together.

"I know this is not the best time to tell you this Rain, but I have feelings for you"

Her eyes widen in amazement to his revelation while he still held her face close to his.

"It kills me every time I see you with him, I know we have a connection and I know you feel it too"

"I just wish…I just want"

"Aidan, please don't" she begged. It was too much, she needed him in her life in ways that she couldn't understand. The way her body responded to him was frightening even for her as she tried to convince herself that Carl was the one.

"I think I am falling…"

"Shhhhh" she placed her finger over his mouth afraid of what he might say and the implications for them both. She then pecked him on the lips and kissed him on his forehead.

"We are friends, let's not damage that because I don't know what I would do without you" she said

Tormented and torn he looked her in the eye and asked "Can you stay the night? I don't think any of us should be alone tonight. I just want to hold you, I promise that is all I will do"

Confused and torn herself Rain against her better judgement agreed and stayed the night with him. That night they laid awake in each other's arms in silence listening to each other breathe and taking in the scent of the other.


End file.
